RIZZOLI & ISLES

Out of Control

InkWheels

Title: Out of Control

Author: InkWheels

Fandom: Rizzoli & Isles

Pairing: Jane/Maura

Rating: PG

Summary: Just playing around with character’s emotions when Jane gets hurt.

Author’s note: I didn’t really have a full storyline to go with this one. It’s just a random thought I had that started with only one scene. I don’t have any current plans to write a sequel, but if another writer out there has some ideas sparked from this and would like to take it on please let me know. I’d love to see where you’d take this!

Out of Control

InkWheels

Chapter 1

Flashback

“Do you ever…get scared?” Maura asked hesitantly.

“Scared?”

“Yeah. Like afraid of getting hurt or…worse…dying?”

Jane huffed instead of answering, mostly because the question is what scared her. She knew damn well what the answer was but shook her head and sipped her wine rather than obliging her with a response.

Back to present

That question became an appropriate one as Jane’s still form was slid out of the back of the ambulance with great care and urgency.

The EMT’s quickly wheeled her down the hallway as if they were running a race.

They were, really.

A race to save her life.

Back in the waiting area, Maura nervously paced as she was denied further entry, despite flashing her credentials; leaving Jane alone. It pained her to watch the doors close; building a wall between them.

“You can wait over there in the waiting area,” a middle–aged nurse said as she pointed across the hall. “There’s a small room on your left that’s a little more private if you’d like.”

“Thank you,” Maura squeaked out as she turned and walked in that direction.

She felt as if she were floating on air and everything around her wasn’t real.

Rather than taking a seat, she stood for a few moments; lost in her own world as she tried to make sense of the evening. She didn’t realize she began to wander aimlessly around the room.

It wasn’t long before Frost and Korsak arrived at the hospital; each hellbent on finding out what was going on but the staff remained tight–lipped on her condition until her parents were notified.

Korsak entered the room and found Maura staring off into space, chewing on her thumbnail.

“Maura? You okay, darlin’?”

“No,” she said flatly.

“Can you tell me what happened?”

Maura stuttered as her brain felt like it was a record skipping on a turntable. “She…we were having dinner. Thursday is pizza night. The guy rang the bell, she buzzed him up and when he came to the door…” Maura paused, her breath catching in her throat as the scene immediately played itself in her head.

“Why don’t you sit,” Korsak suggested as he laid a gentle hand onto her shoulder, guiding her down.

Maura’s eyes welled up with tears. “He just shot her.”

“Did you get a look at the shooter at all?”

She shook her head, cursing at herself for not being able to provide anything useful. “No. I was in the kitchen and could only see her standing in the doorway.” She steeled herself against the wave of emotions that were brewing inside her and she was determined not to crumble in front of the detectives. “All I saw was…was the muzzle of the gun underneath the pizza box, the blast and then she fell to the floor.”

“Did he say anything to her?”

“Not that I heard.” Her voice shook and she felt herself on the brink of unraveling. “There was so much blood. I…I see blood every day but…”

Korsak’s hand returned to her shoulder, this time with a squeeze. “This is different.”

“Promise you’ll get him.”

“I promise. Hell, Rizzoli will probably leap off that operating table any minute now and hunt him down herself.” The two chuckled at the thought. “No one’s going to put a slug in her and get away with it, that’s for damn sure.”

“Where is she?!?” Mrs. Rizzoli’s voice boomed from down the hall. “Where’s my baby?”

Both Maura and Korsak stood but Maura put a hand on his arm, “Let me.” She dashed down the hallway to where Angela was having her panic attack. She was alone and understandably afraid.

“Maura! Oh God,” she gasped as she saw her, turning to gather her up in her arms. “Sweetie, are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Maura gasped.

“Where’s Janie? I need to see her. What the hell happened?” Her mouth kept spilling out all the questions that swirled around in her head.

“You can’t,” Maura said as she broke the embrace. “She’s in surgery right now. They’re going to take good care of her.”

Tears began to fall faster. “What happened? How bad is it? You were there. Is she okay?”

Maura wove her arm around Angela’s and started to guide her towards the room. “She was shot in the chest, point blank.”

“Oh God!”

Maura felt Angela’s knees give way at the news. Luckily, Korsak wasn’t too far away and grabbed her other arm; both of them helping to keep her from falling to the ground.

“My baby! I can’t lose my baby!”

Maura embraced the older woman again. “Shhh. She’ll pull through. You know how tough Jane is.”

The next few hours were awkwardly silent as they waited for the surgeon to update them on Jane’s condition.

Chapter 2

It wasn’t until a little after 3am when a tall man in scrubs entered the room, bearing news of Jane’s condition.

“Mrs. Rizzoli?”

“Yes. Is..is she okay?”

“I’m Doctor Prior, I performed her surgery. Everything went well. She’s extremely lucky despite having the bullet puncture her lung. It could have been worse if the bullet entered an inch higher.”

Maura rubbed Angela’s arm as they listened to the doctor.

“The bullet entered her chest on her left side, breaking two ribs, puncturing her lung and exiting out her back; breaking two more ribs. Needless to say, she’s going to be in a great deal of pain for a while so we’ll have her sedated for a few days and slowly ease her off the medication. She lost a lot of blood and it got quite tense in there for a little bit, but she’s a fighter.”

“Can I see her?”

He glanced at his watch quickly. “I’d prefer you wait until this afternoon. She’s in I.C.U. right now and on a ventilator for the next few hours. She won’t know you’re there.”

“Oh Janie will know I’m there.”

“Still, I highly suggest this afternoon. Let the staff tend to her over the next few hours and do what they need to do. She needs constant care right now because of all the trauma. I’ll be honest and tell you that she looks like she’s in rough shape with all the tubes and machines. I don’t want to make this harder on you anymore than it already is. After lunch she should be moved into her own room if all goes well and there is no more internal bleeding.”

“Come on, Mrs. Rizzoli, we can come back later and check on her.” Maura put her arm around the woman, trying to put her at ease; knowing there was nothing in the world she could do or say to make the situation any easier to take.

“Fine. I’ll wait.” She paused for a moment, wiping the tears from her eyes. “Please watch over my baby, doctor. And tell her I was here.”

He patted the back of her hand as he stood. “I will.” He smiled at them and walked out of the room.

“Come on, let’s get you home,” Maura said as she helped Angela to stand. “I’ll drive you.”

“No, I’m fine. I just…I just can’t believe this happened.” Running her hand across her forehead, she took a few steps away from Maura. “No. Wait. In a way I can believe this happened. If I’ve told her once I’ve told her a million times that this job is too dangerous and it was going to catch up with her one of these days.” She kept shaking her head; folding her arms over her chest. “I thought I’d be more prepared for this day.”

This time, Korsak came to her side, placing an arm around her. “Nothing can ever prepare you for this, Mrs. Rizzoli. Even if Jane got hurt doing something else, it’s never easy when your child is hurt, no matter how old they are.”

Taking a tissue, she dabbed at her eyes and nose. “No offense, but I hate her job.”

With that comment, she walked away.

Frost was about to go after her but Korsak stopped him. “Let her go. She needs some time alone to process all of this.”

Chapter 3

First it was the sound that hit her, then the smell. The sound of her heart monitor beeping beside her and the smell of disinfectant, bandages, and all the other God awful smells associated with a hospital clued her in to where she was.

She hated hospitals.

Rolling her tired eyes and grimacing as pain introduced itself to her, she turned her head and saw Maura by her bedside.

With slight hesitation, Maura rose from her chair and moved closer to Jane, taking her hand in hers. “Hi,” she said softly, watching Jane struggle to keep her eyes open.

“Hi,” she croaked out in response before shutting her eyes and grimacing.

“Are you okay?”

Swallowing hard, Jane forced her eyes open again. “Been better.” A small smile formed on her lips for a mere moment.

“Your mom was here earlier. She’s coming back later with your father and brother.”

“How…how long’ve you been here?” Jane mumbled.

“A few hours, but I was here all night last night when they brought you in.”

Jane’s head rolled to the side to face Maura better and she saw her eyes glistening with tears. “I’m…I’m sorry.”

Maura’s brow creased in confusion. “Why are you sorry?”

“You were there. Could’ve…”

She squeezed Jane’s hand gently. “I’m just glad you’re still here with me.”

Before Jane could say another word, a nurse entered the room; quickly realizing that Jane was awake. “I’ll let the detectives know she’s awake.”

“Can we have a few minutes before you do that?” Maura asked.

“I’m sorry. I have specific orders to alert the detectives as soon as Ms. Rizzoli woke up because…”

“They need my statement blah blah blah.” Shutting her eyes, she grunted slightly as all the talking was starting to wear on her.

The nurse gave them a lop–sided grin and exited the room.

“Let me go out there and see if I can get them to wait while you rest.”

“No. It’s…it’s fine,” Jane whispered, hoping that lowering her tone would ease the pain. It didn’t. “Get it over with.”

Maura was about to leave the room when Korsak entered. “How you feeling, kiddo?”

“Like I got shot.”

“Nice to see they didn’t remove your wise ass bone.”

“I’ll wait outside,” Maura said as she let go of Jane’s hand.

Jane kept a firm grip, wincing slightly as the tug pulled on her injuries. “Stay.”

Maura smiled at her, her heart thumping wildly in her chest at the idea of Jane wanting her to stay. She held onto her hand, rubbing it to soothe her.

He looked at Maura and smiled. “I’ll make this quick.”

Jane nodded, trying to stay awake.

“Do you know who shot you?”

“No.”

“What was he wearing?”

Jane paused for a moment, flashing back to the previous night. “Baseball cap, bandanna, dark jacket, jeans…sunglasses.” She stopped for a moment, licking her dry lips. Finding the words to speak was starting to become more difficult. “Face covered.”

“Did he say anything to you?”

Jane shook her head and inhaled slowly as a wave of pain came over her. She placed her hand over the wound as she waited for it to pass.

Maura bit her bottom lip, wanting to comfort her more than just holding her hand.

“I’m sorry, Jane. If I had my way I’d be letting you sleep right now.” He reached out towards her, patting her cheek softly. He liked Jane; treated her like a daughter. It pained him to see her hurt.

“S’okay.”

Maura continued to look on; feeling helpless.

“Do you have any idea who would do this to you?”

She shook her head. “Could be anyone I’ve pissed off over the years.”

“Maura mentioned that you two have pizza every Thursday. I know this is a stupid question, Rizzoli, but I have to ask. Did he look at all like anyone that might have delivered to you before?”

She shook her head and fought to keep her eyes open.

“Do you always call the same pizza place?”

“Yeah,” she whispered; her voice dry and pained.

Korsak watched her eyes close and her body relax as she drifted off to sleep. Clearing his throat to mask his emotion, he nervously tugged on the lapel of his jacket, as if to straighten wrinkles; wrinkles that weren’t really there.

Leaning over, he kissed her on the forehead, rubbing her arm as he turned towards Maura who hadn’t moved from her side. “I’ll talk to her some more later.”

“I’m not sure there’s much more to tell.”

Korsak nodded and bowed his head. “I know. There’s really not much to go on.” He started walking towards the door. “Maybe as she gets stronger she’ll remember something. Call me if you need anything, okay?”

Maura hugged him and his reaction revealed that he wasn’t expecting it. “Thank you for always being there for her.”

Korsak broke the embrace and smiled. “She’s had my back many times so I’ll always have hers. Plus, those dimples are too damn cute to ignore.”

A flash of excitement rushed through Maura at the thought because she too was attracted to Jane’s dimples; amongst other things.

Korsak left the room and Maura returned to Jane’s side; stroking her hair gently. “Oh Jane. You worry me sometimes.” Tilting her head, she watched the raven–haired detective sleep; noting her ragged breath from her injuries and wishing she could somehow take her pain away. “I pray everyday that you never end up on my table.”

She continued to watch over her; losing track of time. But it didn’t matter.

Chapter 4

Jane’s homecoming was a flurry of drama, courtesy of her mother.

“Are you sure you want to go back home? I’m telling you, Jane, stay with me and your father so I can keep an eye on you and take care of you.”

Jane rolled her eyes as her mother parked the car in front of her apartment building. “Ma! Enough. I want my own bed and I want to be in my own home.”

Angela started to tear up. “But…it happened here.”

Jane’s mouth skewed as she bit the inside of her cheek. “I have to face it sooner or later and just move on. I’m not going to live in fear.”

“I know but must you always insist on ‘getting over it’ so quickly? Give yourself a chance to heal from it. Please, come stay with us.”

Jane opened the car door and slowly eased herself out just as Maura walked out of the apartment building to greet her.

“You okay?” Maura asked, wanting desperately to show some sign of affection but hesitant in giving away her true feelings.

“Save me from her,” Jane mumbled, leaning towards her.

“She’ll be fine, Mrs. Rizzoli. I’ll keep an eye on her.”

A truck came along and started beeping at them because they were parked in a loading zone.

“Thank you, God,” Jane mumbled some more. “Sorry, ma. Looks like you have to move. I’ll be fine. I’ll call you later.”

“You better call me, Jane or I’ll come back over here!”

“Then I will be sure to call you.” Jane smiled and turned towards Maura who helped her inside.

They walked slowly down the hallway, pausing a few times for Jane to catch her breath.

“Hope you have the rest of the day off because this is taking forever,” Jane chuckled.

“It’s okay. Take your time.” Maura squeezed the brunette’s waist.

They got to the door of Jane’s apartment and Maura took note of the scared look on Jane’s face. She could almost see the flashbacks happening in Jane’s mind.

She hesitated in touching her, not wanting to scare her. Instead, she slipped the key in the lock and unlocked it but didn’t open the door. “Do you want me to go in first?” Maura asked.

Jane jumped slightly, as if startled out of her daydream. “No. No. I’m good. It’s okay.” She reached out, turned the doorknob and walked inside; immediately looking down at the carpet in search of a large blood stain.

There wasn’t one.

“I cleaned up for you after they did what they needed to do.”

For a split second, Jane could almost swear she could smell the sick coppery smell of blood. “Thanks. I’m sure that wasn’t easy for you to do.”

“No. It wasn’t but it had to be done.” Maura shut the door behind them, being sure to lock it. “Let’s sit you down.” She guided her over to the sofa and helped ease her down; cautious of the tender wounds that were still healing.

Jane looked around. “Did you clean the entire apartment or are we in the wrong place?”

Maura laughed and sat down in front of her on the Ottoman. “I cleaned everything.” She glanced down at her hands for a moment. “It helped me from going crazy. Being here made me feel close to you.” She looked back up at Jane as her cheeks began to sting from embarrassment. “Sorry, I know that sounds weird.”

Jane took her hand. “It’s not weird. I know what you mean.” She rubbed the soft flesh over Maura’s knuckles with her thumb. “I appreciate it.”

Maura started to cry.

“Whoah. What’d I say?”

“Nothing. Nothing. It’s not you, it’s me.”

Jane shook her head, confused.

“I’ve never been in a situation like this before where someone I care about almost died in my arms. I had your blood all over me and I should be used to the sight but…”

“Oh Maura, I’m sorry. Come here.” Jane tugged on her hand in an effort to get her to sit next to her.

She got up and carefully sat down next to Jane who gingerly put her arm around her and kissed the top of her head.

“I shouldn’t be falling apart on you like this.” Running her fingers underneath her eyes, she tried to clear the tears away. “The last thing you want to talk about right now is all this.” She nervously laughed and snuffed away more tears. “I should be taking care of you, not the reverse.”

Jane didn’t answer right away, she drifted off into a flashback of that night. Before she knew it, words were tumbling out of her mouth.

“I remember the initial feeling of when the bullet hit me. Despite having been pinned to the ground by two scalpels, it was…different. The pain was just different. More intense. I’ve never been shot before but you see it on TV and in the movies and it’s not as innocent as they make it appear. Someone gets hit, they go down and get back up for a fight. No. The pain. The pain and the sound just paralyzed me.”

Maura squeezed her hand. “The gunshot was pretty loud.”

“No. I don’t mean the sound of the actual gunshot, I mean the sound you hear when it goes through flesh and bone. I could hear it the whole way through.” Absently, she rubbed the wound in her side. “It makes my stomach turn just thinking about it.”

Maura frowned as a tear rolled down her cheek.

“I hit the ground and my world just darkened around me. I remember seeing your face above me and I so wanted to pull you down under me and protect you in case he decided to keep shooting, but I…I just passed out.”

“There was nothing you could have done. You didn’t have your gun on you.”

“I just hate feeling like he had complete control over me and incapacitated me. It reminded me…of that night.” The flashbacks of Hoyt hovering over her body, ready to slit her throat came rushing back.

Maura moved in closer, nuzzling herself under Jane’s arm. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”

Jane did her best to keep the tears at bay. “I got bits and pieces of your voice telling me I was going to be okay. I held onto that. I remember opening my eyes for a few minutes in the emergency room and you weren’t there but I kept hearing your voice.”

“They wouldn’t let me in to be with you. I tried.”

“When I woke up, I was glad that you were the first face I saw.” Jane laughed a bit. “I would never have guessed I’d find you by my side.”

Maura smiled and covered Jane’s lips with hers and ignited a short yet tender kiss.

“Wow. That was something else I never guessed would have happened. I mean, I’m happy it did.”

“And there could be more, if you know what I mean.” Maura shot her a devilish grin. “Too bad it’ll have to wait until you’re better.”

“Hey wait. That’s no fair to tease me like that. Besides, I’m fine.”

“Right.”

Jane made a feeble attempt at getting up to show her she was wrong, but it was Jane that was wrong. “Ow. Ugh. Shit. You’re right.” Rubbing her sore side, she surrendered to the fact that their bedroom romps would have to take a backseat for a while.

“This just gives me more time to spoil you and play nurse.” Maura began kissing Jane’s neck and along her jawline.

“I could get used to this.”

~ ~ ~