Sure I Was Helping.


FANDOM: Birds of Prey TV-Verse

PAIRING: Barbara/Helena

DISCLAIMER: These characters and situations do not belong to me in any way, shape, or form. I have borrowed them as part of my sanity maintenance.

RATING: Um that'd be a U.

SUMMARY: School days with the birds…

Ficathon: BoP-Challenges - 12Days
Prompt/Word Count: 11. Pick On Me Day - 1605 words.

E-MAIL: or feedback at  mrswoman LJ  @

The school gym echoed to the sounds of fists connecting, deep grunts of pain, and the occasional 'oohs' and 'ahs' of the too interested onlookers. At the end of it all, two young women fought themselves to a standstill and a blonde teenager stood astride a sable haired beauty, looking down with obvious disdain.

Or, rather, that was the picture Dinah and Helena had so cleverly concocted.

Two weeks before, when Dinah had arrived at the clocktower, seething with rage, she'd calmly informed Babs that something had to be done. She'd insisted that being threatened on a daily basis by the school bullies was not acceptable; that being called 'teacher's pet' was too much, and that having her best pants ripped was beyond the limit.

She'd gone on to add, in a firm voice, that her new found skills of combat meant she could quite easily deal with the problem and that she was just informing Babs out of courtesy. Barbara, of course, acted like the concerned guardian she was, and more irritatingly, like the Oracle she insisted on being. Barbara said that *she* would deal with it in the Principal's office and that Dinah need worry no more.

Helena had smiled and followed Dinah into the training room. Her little prank of a few weeks before when she'd had Dinah chasing Billy-No-Names across Gotham deserved some sort of apology; this revenge was a perfect excuse.

Two weeks they had spent choreographing the dance of violence they had just performed; two weeks they had taken to orchestrate this elaborate ruse, and two weeks to ensure Babs hadn’t caught wind of their plan. Today had been the culmination.

Helena reached up to take Dinah's hand and glanced around at the watching thugs. Of course, a carefully leaked Chinese whisper had made certain they would be in the school gym to watch two hotties beat the hell out of each other. Dinah had known that Gabby could spin that yarn to perfection, and sure enough, it was looks of admiration that now stared across the gym floor.

Helena wiped the blood from her nose and bowed in an exaggerated fashion, raising her voice so that all could hear.

"You win, D; I'm confident Batman will take you on his team." She then grabbed Batgirl's cape off the spectator benches and swished it elaborately around her head. Her senses heard the whistles of awe meander around the crowd.

Throwing her arms around Dinah and then shaking her hand roughly, she whispered, "And now I'd better get this cape back to the tower before Babs finds out it's gone."

Dinah chuckled and pushed her friend out of the hall, walking towards Gabby with a big grin on her face. Blood dripped from a small cut over her eye, put there by Helena to make certain the second half of their plan succeeded.

"Did you plant the seeds for Plan B?"

Gabby raised her eyebrow. "Of course." She glanced at the wall-clock and began to count. "5-4-3-2-1-"

The doors to the gym flew open and in strode Principal Brown, imperious in his anger.

"DINAH LANCE! What do you think you're doing?"

"Um, nothing, Sir."

"Nothing. NOTHING. Ms Gordon alerted me to the fight it's pretty obvious you've been a part of, so I certainly don't think your answer can be nothing."

Dinah bowed her head in contrition, allowing herself to see the looks of surprise on the crowd.

Part B had been getting the thugs to believe Babs had actually reported her ward of court, thereby showing she was no teacher's pet. If it meant she had to accept some punishment, so be it; looking at Brown's face that appeared to be an absolute certainty.

"My office, NOW!"

* * * * *

Meanwhile, Helena wandered the hallways of Gotham High, wondering if she dare pop in and say hello to Barbara. It seemed a shame when she was in the same building to not grace her woman with a visit.

Turning quickly, she made sure the cape was well hidden in her backpack and headed towards Barbara's classroom. Out of the corner of her eye, a poster caught her interest.

'Thanksgiving Competition, the winner of the following quiz will have the opportunity to grill their homeroom teacher over 20 yes/no questions. Any question, any topic. You know you've always wanted to ask that important question - do you fart in the bathtub? – go on, $2 entry, how easy can it be? All proceeds to Gotham Central's NICU.'

Helena smiled. It wasn't those words that brought out her smile; it was the added strip across the middle of some photograph or other. 'The winner is Barry Calpol from Ms. Gordon's homeroom. 20Q afternoon is Thursday 15th'.

This time she grinned; now she understood why Barbara had been a little tetchy that morning. The intensely private woman hated to answer questions about herself, and today was the day; this was something Helena would love to see.

On reaching Barbara's room, she glanced through the doorway to see her lover, sitting in front of her desk and looking out over a sea of grinning faces. At the moment, the girls all looked to be sighing while the boys all had a silly grin on their face. Helena could see that Barbara was cringing in her chair. It seemed she’d arrived at just the right time.

She crept into the room like the cat that she was, and only one head turned to glance at her. She put her finger to her lips, and the young woman smiled in understanding.

At the front of the class, Helena could see a greasy haired teenager with a notebook in his lap, gazing adoringly towards Babs. Barbara, in contrast, was gazing out of the classroom window, her hands slowly wringing in her lap, a gesture Helena recognized as mild panic.

"Number 4: Do you still have sex?"

A chorus of snickers echoed around the room.

"Barry, I don't think that's appropriate." Helena laughed inside at Barbara's indignant response.

"But Miss Gordon, Mr. Brown said you had to answer every question I asked… truthfully."

This time Helena couldn't hold in her splutter; if there was one thing Barbara wouldn't do, even at a time like this, it was to tell a blatant lie to an, albeit, cocky question, but an honest question at that. She watched as a blush crept slowly up Bab's slender neck. Helena remembered the last time she’d seen that blush rise slowly up that long, easily kissable neck, and knew Barbara's answer would come; just like Babs still did – often.


Helena could almost hear Barbara's teeth grinding. She could hear Barry's next question.

"Number 5: are you giving us a pop quiz tomorrow?"

Barbara's eyes lit up at the question; these sorts of questions she could answer, no problem.

Helena took the time to watch her lover. It was rare she had the time to just sit and look. Usually, they were like ships passing in the night; Barbara in from school as Helena went off to the bar, Helena in from sweeps as Babs called up their other allies for a crime update. Occasionally, they collapsed exhausted into each others arms to fall asleep in easy comfort and often, they collapsed into each other's arms, took their fill, and then slept. Rarely, did she observe the way Barbara's eyelids fluttered shut as she thought, rarely, did she see the flicker of gold in Babs green eyes, and very rarely, did she hear the exasperated but loving sigh that she heard in Babs voice as she joked with her class of teenagers.

Barbara might moan about her profession, but it was something she loved and, right now, seeing how much the kids adored her partner, Helena knew it was something that Barbara needed.

"Number 19: are you in love?"

Whether she'd still love her job after that question, Helena wasn't sure, but she herself was more than ready to hear the answer. She knew she loved Barbara, and she was pretty sure Barbara loved her, but the words had never been spoken to each other since they got together as a couple. While she waited for the truth, an idea struck her.

She reached over to tap the girl who’d spotted her enter the room, requesting the use of a pencil. Quickly scribbling a few words, she folded it, then wrote Barry across the front and passed it forward.


Just as Barbara answered Helena coughed. Barbara's head jerked upwards at the sound, and it was comical how her eyes seemed to pop out of her skull. This time her blush swept up to the crown of her forehead. All Helena could do was smile.

Their eyes met just as Barry opened up the small note. Helena noticed his grin turn into a leer and almost called the words back. It was too late.

"Number 20: are you in love with Helena Kyle?"

This time it was a gasp of surprise that ran around the room.

Barbara's eyes met Helena's, and the rest of Gotham High disappeared into the ether as Helena watched Barbara whirl the words around her over-active brain. A smile of understanding passed between them as Helena saw Barbara make her decision and open her mouth to speak.

"Barry, before I answer, thank you for the questions, and more importantly, thank you all for raising $500 for NICU. Now, let's finish this Q&A session."

Her eyes caught Helena's once more.

"My final answer is…"

Helena almost missed the answer as Principal Brown stormed into Barbara's room with words of his own.

"Helena Kyle!"

~ ~ ~